Wednesday 30 May 2012

You can say what you want about three hours sleep not being enough to function on, but who’s to say what is enough sleep to function on? I’ll tell you who: The National Sleep Foundation of America. And they be are saying this: 7 -9 hours. Assuming an American hour is the same as a British one then this means my sleep was either just under half of what was needed or a third of what was needed.

But…and this is the quote-unquote ‘clever’  bit: I read somewhere that sleep after you’ve had a drink doesn’t count as sleep to your body. This sounds at best 22% or 28% feasible. It must count for something. But for the sake of me proving no point or saying nothing humorous remedy this booze-sleep mytho-fact actualised as a truth. If booze sleep doesn’t count then you as might as well have three hours as nine. Either way no hours or three hours wasn’t enough sleep for someone who had to spend a way being alert and impressive. It would also not be enough sleep for me doing my training either.

And yes, not enough sleep was definitely the issue and not the ten pints of Becks I had the night before. Which reminds me, I went out to smoke a few times during the course of yesterday night. There was a man there with a woman one time. You know when you can tell people are having/will later be having sex? Well if you don’t you should go the Village Hotel in Dudley last night and watch out for a man and a woman having a cigarette together stood near me. Well, the next time I went out he was alone and struck up a conversation with me. Turned out he was from Preston (“I went to University there” etc) but living at this hotel while he worked nearby.

Then, for some reason, he managed to tell me he had a house in Preston where his ex-wife lived with their child, a girlfriend in London and a girlfriend in Manchester. And he was clearly about the add another wheel to his sex-vehicle with the woman in the hotel bar/smoking with him earlier. I said how he proved you didn’t have to be Ryan Giggs to have multiple partners on the go. Fortunately he didn’t really notice the fact that I was taking the piss out of him as he was wallowing in the self-pity that only a (not particularly attractive) man with several partners can wallow in, “It’s not as good as it sounds, it’s a nightmare”. Why do people in scenarios like this always moan about it? STOP HAVING A WIFE AND TWO GIRLFRIENDS AND HOTEL SEX you fucking melon – if it’s making you moan to random strangers outside hotels that you live in.

Checking out was a bittersweet, and I’ll tell you for why:

PLUS (+): Despite having gone to the bar three times after last orders and thus charged drinks to my room I was only charged £13.50 for drinks. Which is pretty good for nine pints of Becks. Yes, nine pints of Becks in Dudley – but unfortunately they don’t price beer accurately in proportion to how shit somewhere is. Well they do in a way but not that proportionally. If a pint of Becks is pushing £4 in Manchester it should be about 20p in Dudley.

MINUS (-) I had to leave the flower I bought for Duncan Edward’s grave in my room. I didn’t want to take them into my meeting (I don’t think I would have broken anyone’s heart but a few people might have thought they were for the presenter or something, to say thank you, and I don’t want to be the person who minutely disappoints someone by raising the faintest possibility that some cheap flowers that didn’t even get to rest on a grave in Dudley and spent the night in a sink in an unimaginative hotel). So, I left them in the bathroom. There were something suggestive of so many possible stories about a bunch of flowers. Admittedly they, along with the truth, were quite sad and possibly pathetic.

Highlights of today’s training: someone describing a newsletter as though it was some alien concept that breaking down on all expectations and norms of sending people information they could probably do without: A man seeing a diagram plotting skills against motivation, thinking about it and then saying his preference for a team member would be for a highly skilled and highly motivated. Which set him apart from everyone else whose ideal team member were a mix of the unskilled, unmotivated and motivated unskilled people.


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2 Responses to Wednesday 30 May 2012

  1. eleanor priestley says:

    What a pretty picture.

  2. house78 says:

    Of all the pictures I’ve put on these blogs I didn’t think it would be the one of some £2.70 Tesco flowers, that were meant for the grave of a footballer, in a Village Hotel bathroom that would be the first one to get a compliment, let alone be called pretty. I don’t feel so bad about wasting the £2.70 now.

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