Monday 06 October 2014

I listen to an interview with the comedian Josie Long. She is a very positive person and says she thinks being positive is the best way to get through life and that negativity gets you nowhere. She says this a few times during the interview. One time she says it after making a bitchy comment about someone who gives her bad reviews. Everyone gets to make a few snide comments, surely.

But how do you do it? How do you stop being negative?

People keep telling me to do this this way or think this another way but they don’t say how you do it. Apart from the thing where someone told me how to do it a bit – but also told me I didn’t need cognitive behavioural therapy. But it was like ‘instead of thinking you have cancer all the time accept that maybe you don’t have cancer because you have no evidence that you have cancer and you have visited a doctor with these concerns – and the doctor says you’re not likely to have it at this age’.

Well: duh.

Only, I am quite clever. I can understand the above rationale. But…people younger and better than me get illnesses that kill them. Are you telling me that focussing on the three or four instances of this I know of don’t counteract all the hundreds of cases I know where people just plod on not dying. Well if it works for you.

Basically it’s about rewriting how you think. Like your thoughts are a draft of the way you should think and that you need to do a rewrite. That’s great. I like the theory. But the guy who does the re-writes isn’t always around and the initial thoughts just get broadcast in my head. This includes thoughts about how cognitive behavioral therapy will work. Go figure.

I genuinely think I could only completely relax about my health if I had a full medical and scans once a week. And even then I would probably feel a lump in the roof of my mouth (that has always been there) on Thursday and spend the rest of the week worrying about what it is.

I am going to try and give this reframing my thoughts thing a go. Then something will get me when I stop worrying. That’s just bloody typical. Etc

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