Wednesday 09 July 2014

I’m no arbiter of what’s not and what is fat. I’m not the judge and jury of obesity – I don’t even think that’s a thing. I certainly don’t want to judge obesity or appearances. I am not the Daily Mail. I don’t think thin is win; that said I am not a painfully thin person who clearly under-eats to stay thin yet goes on about how it’s OK to be overweight.

I’m somewhere in the middle. And this isn’t really about people being fat. I like curves and roundness. It’s about a shape. A shape that kind of, yes, I only see with a certain size. But I preferred Janine in Eastenders when she big and Christina Ricci lost all her appeal to me when she was thin.

I am not anti-fat OK?

But when some people’s shape is that their arms are not at the side of their body and more on their front, like some of the Mr Men. Then sometimes when I see that I think, that’s a bit big that. And I think it makes that person look a bit odd. And I think if I looked a bit like my arms were little paws on my front – rather than limbs at my side  – that I might think I should do something about it.

But I am not saying anyone should. Just what I think I would say to myself if I were in that position. That’s all. You can’t call me a bully for saying what I would say to my hypothetical self. My hypothetical, OK partially hypothetical, fat self is fine with this attack. What? Do you think my partially hypothetical much/some fatter self is a strong independent – if perennially hungry – man. And he don’t need yo’ sympathy.

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