Friday 14 February 2014

Where do you even start with a story like this? [see below]

  • Where does she get off looking through his phone? Haha! that is the least shocking part of this story and therefore making out like this is the most shocking bit is funny because it plays about with what you expect.
  • Seriously though…remove all the context and going through his phone is pretty shitty isn’t it? Is finding this justification for doing it? If so then don’t get offended with what the governments read people’s locked Instagram accounts/emails/phone calls.
  • What does someone’s face look like when they discover something like this?
  • Did she watch it again? You’d probably need to watch it again eh? “No way was he fucking my dog in that video. I must have seen it wrong. I’d best double check before we have a row about it and I end up looking silly.”
  • Has at any point since has she thought, “I’ve ruined a good thing by snooping.”
  • Especially given the timing. “Did Wayne get you a valentines card?”, “No, he fucked my dog and filmed it and then I saw the video so we’re not together anymore.”
  • I like his lack of excuses. A lesser man would have tried some tall tale.
  • WHY DID HE FILM IT?
  • We all know why he filmed it and it begs the question, what is weirder? Fucking a dog or filming yourself fuck a dog so you can later watch the video and wank off to it?
  • How many people have made a joke about the girlfriend** when someone has told them about Wayne thingy getting charged with fucking a dog?
  • I think the story doesn’t need the cannabis angle; it would survive without it.
  • What is the cannabis bit all about? “Bought wet and was drying out?” How does that statement come about?
  • Who buys it wet to dry out?
  • Was he caught with it on a different occasion to being arrested for fucking a Staffordshire bull terrier?
  • Being given bail on the understanding that you are not allowed to be left alone with animals is pretty low on the list of things people would want from life.
  • Is he a bit offended that he can’t be left alone with a parrot?
  • He filmed the first time he ever has sex with a dog. I don’t believe him. People don’t film the first time they do something like that. They film the fifth or sixth time.
  • JUST TO REITERATE A MAN FILMED HIMSELF FUCKING A DOG.
  • Perhaps a move to Germany is in order when he gets out (after a maximum of two years).
Screen Shot 2014-02-14 at 22.34.45

taken from metro.co.uk

*I mean the girlfriend in this story, not a generic laddy reference to anyone’s girlfriend. I’m not that guy.

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