Saturday 27 April 2013

Smooth…real smooth

If there’s one way to get me to iron some shirts it’s to buy a new iron so that the mundane task of making some shirt-shaped cotton more straight. So, don’t be unsurprised when I tell you that I decreased the number of unironed shirts by ‘several’ this day and the reason for it is being that I bought myself a new iron.

I went with the Morphy Richards Turbosteam 40699. As ever I thoroughly researched this – I read some Amazon reviews. This was the first time I have bought an iron and this was my first time researching irons. Turns out the customer reviews of irons are as unhelpful and contradictory of reviews of absolutely everything.

Lynne Sanchez said that the iron was “very smooth when ironing clothes” which is helpfully specific. Until my eyes read the words “when ironing clothes” I had thought the iron was unnecessarily charismatic around people and able to easily sway favour.

Aside from several sexist review by pwopah geezers (“I don’t know if its any good but my wife says I’ve done her a big favour with this iron”; “I bought my wife this iron as an anniversary present and the stupid cow moaned – she does admit it’s a good iron, though”) the best review was by a woman from Manchester who said:

“when it arrived i thought it couldn’t possibly be in the box it was so light! i sent it back without even trying to use it for this reason. definitely not a £50 iron”

Who thinks that is what reviewing something is? I didn’t trust the objects weight so I sent it back. I do admire how old fashioned her thinking is: it cannot be worth £50 because it isn’t very heavy. Things stopped having to be heavy in the late 1980s. Doesn’t she know anything? Does she really think irons still work on the same principle of when people used a large weight of hot metal to flatten out creases? What does she think the water and electricity are involved for?

Also who thinks reviews are important enough to post but clearly ignores reading them? The reviews of this iron are generally very positive and no-one mentions the iron not working because it is too light. Mainly because that’s not a thing that stops irons working in the 21st century.

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