Sunday 24 February 2013

How about we open a bar called Appropriate Behaviour? Then people will always be like I’m in Appropriate Behaviour when they tell people where they are  – it sounds like Inappropriate Behaviour, get it?

Inappropriate behaviour is the done thing to have been being accused of doing for your man about town at the moment. Whether it be Liberal Democrat cheese grande Lord Suspiciously close to the French for Fox or The Pope of Scotland, inappropriate behaviour is something in the past people might have done.

I think it is safe to say that neither party has been talking to people while they were in important phone calls or bidding for things on eBay and then not paying. Rennard’s behaviour has been defined more specifically as sexually inappropriate. Even though the accusations against Cardinal Archbishop seem to be of a similar nature the word sexually seems to appear less in the reports.

Maybe I am reading something sinister between the lines accusations such as “unwanted behaviour” after “late-night drinking” and that “the cardinal used night prayers as an excuse for inappropriate contact.

What extends this beyond a story about an old Scottish man trying to wank off some young priests is that O’Brien has a vote in this year’s convocation of convocations. That’s right: those inappropriate hands that may have slid where they weren’t wanted will be sliding all over the voting forms in Pope Factor 2013 – unless they are doing phone votes this time.

At the risk of sounding as though I think I am something special, I’m afraid I don’t really see tabloid newspapers so I don’t know if any of them have used the vulgar headline ‘CARDINAL SIN.’

What goes on at investigations into this kind of thing in church? Isn’t HE behind everything that happens (that happens for a reason(that is all part of a big plan))? Is HE not in the hearts of priests who love the church – but also sometimes want to kiss other men or run naked in a field (with other men)? Or is it one of them convenient times where his role in stuff like that is limited to adult men and women (who are married) making a baby?

Oscar Go

I made a half-hearted attempt at staying up for the Oscars (The Academy Awards) but gave up with at least an hour to go. The main reason was Kelly Osbourne. Despite lacking intellect, charm, humour, charisma, looks and class Osbourne proves that it really is all about who you know (by being born to them) that can make a career in showbusiness. If I am going to watch telecasts of famous people saying what shop their clothes are from I don’t know why I should expect anything other than being dismayed at the human race in one way or another.

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