Friday 28 December 2012

It’s customary to do some kind of review of the year when you are under some delusion that anyone will read what you are writing – though generally more when you are a professional journalist and someone is paying you. Regardless, here is some shit about stuff from the last year:

Music in 2012

I’ve got no clue about anything to do with music anymore. Fuck all. This, without any sarcasm at all, is perhaps my favourite song of 2o12:

The other contender is this:

And I don’t see why I can’t like them both. Like there are people queueing up to tell me I can’t like a pop band aimed at young girls and the man who would be king of the British urban condition, Plan B.

In many ways this was lined up to be the year of Plan B. This fucking amazing song was from his debut directorial effort as a film-maker (also called Ill Manors) as well as being the co-lead in the modern day big screen outing of The Sweeney. Other than a lot of credit for trying I don’t think it really worked out as well as it might might for Plan’.

I did manage to see him live as a support slot at the thing that defined my musical year: The Stone Roses at Heaton Park. I think it was probably a highlight for many of the people that attended. Things seldom live up to the hype but these gigs did for me (twice). And I would have gone on the Saturday as well if I had been offered a spare for that as well.

Other live highlights included Elbow at Jodrell Bank in the Summer – and in December at The Manchester Arena. Tim Burgess was also very good at The Deaf Institute – I’d been a bit underwhelmed by his second solo album until I saw him play it live and then I was won over.

I started out pretending I liked Jake Bugg before I knew anything about him, I just like his name. Then I heard his stuff and was quite taken with him. But I don’t know enough about young people to know if he is actually popular or if he was just a flash in the pan. I feel like a fucking numpty at times when it comes to music. And then I read the Christmas NME and realised that I was at least as sad as this bastion of youth culture.

Some of this year has passed me completely by. I tried to do a good playlist of the year kind of thing. And this is it: it’s fucking shit. I wouldn’t piss on it if pissing on a list of songs were a suggestion that you thought it was a fantastic list of songs.

I am not one of the billion people to have viewed the Gangnam on YouTube. Nor will I be. Not because I think I am above a shit dance hit – but because I like not knowing what everyone is talking about sometimes. It makes it a lot easier to ignore something if you don’t know what it is.

I can’t say quite the same for Alt J. I did listen to a few of their songs when they won the Freddie Mercury Award for Music. And I thought they were fucking shit. So there. They must be fucking buzzing that they are doing something right – a fat 34-year-old man who got the One Direction annual for Christmas doesn’t like their music. Well, Alt J, you can keep your keyboard-name shit.

Don’t worry, I am not going to finish on that negative – I’ll finish with my album of the year which is The Vaccines’ Come of Age. Which I thought was fucking brilliant. Sorry to The Vaccines for this endorsement. Unfortunately I had to miss seeing them tour the album because of some work bullshit. I did see them – again in a support slot for The Stone Roses – but they hadn’t released the album at that stage so it sounded a bit like a man shouting in the wind, as live music often does when you aren’t familiar with it.

I liked a load of pop shit as well. That one about calling someone (perhaps); the one about the lad who was annoyed because his ex-girlfriend didn’t talk to him anymore; and the one about the girl who didn’t want to get back together (ever, ever) with the lad. And the one by the band trying to sound like those banjo lads that ended up being on loads of adverts and that. And the Robbie Williams comeback one.

There are plenty of albums that I have downloaded and not really listened to…so you know the music industry is benefiting from my continued support. My ears just aren’t benefiting from the music that I buy. What my ears did hear was this by Father John Misty which was the last earworm of my musicing 2012:

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