Saturday 02 June 2012

Before when I worked Saturdays I got a decent overtime rate for 3 and a half hours and then double-time after that. Inevitably meetings would start at nine and finish not long after lunch – which for attendees means it’s gone past the point of a half-day meeting; it’s a full day meeting. For someone starting at nine and paid hourly it would mean barely getting into double-time. It’s not like it is all about the money but while I have never been financially comfortable I have never worked a Saturday without the money being a key goal. So, I wouldn’t have minded the meeting dragging on. But they never did.

Now I don’ t get overtime for working on a Saturday. Today the meeting lasted until 4 o’clock and I had to wait an hour after that to sort some stuff out.  These people dying in tragedies don’t know they are born do they? Or these people with terrible disabilities or illnesses. They think they have problems. Try working a few hours and only getting time off in lieu.

It is also the first time I have worked a weekend since I have been on my new floor. I tend to have a bit of a stroll around when I am in on my own, as I was. I must be clear that this is not snooping: there is nothing I see by these brief rambles that I wouldn’t see talking to these people as they sat at their asks. In no way am I interfering in anyone’s private lives – if people leave diaries in a secret compartment at the back of their desks that I happen to find in a routine rigorous strip search of each desk then that is just something that is part of everyday activities.

One person had a homemade poster on the wall. In the interests of not wanting to belittle whoever created the poster I have removed the name and provided some redacting in the picture of it at the foot of the page. Of course that means you can’t read it properly so I have recreated the contents, minus the name, here:

XXXX’s Dictionary

1. I’m the Boss
2. I’m in charge
3. Boss, Worker, Worker, Boss
4. My body is a temple
5. Talk to the hand
6. You need to work harder
7. Humour me
8. Yo!
9. That’s networking
10. You’re cracking up
11. Patience little one
12. It’s a development opportunity
13. Half a job…..
14. That’s life!
15. I am not happy with that….
16. By and enlarge….
17. Have you got a minute?
18. I never make mistakes

I know there might be a few things you might think about this list,

  • Some of them (1 & 2) mean the same thing
  • What is 8 all about?
  • Wouldn’t someone feel a bit sinister saying 11?
  • Why the the ‘en’ of ‘enlarge’ crossed out? Is there some hidden joke about the crossing out and the use of large over enlarge? Or did whoever made the list not notice they had used the word enlarge incorrectly and just cross it out rather than make a new sign?
  • 17 just seems like a polite question rather than anything else.
More than anything, though, you are wondering (I can tell) why the author has called this a dictionary. A dictionary is a list of words being explained/defined, normally in alphabetical order. You don’t need me to tell you that do you? Because everyone knows what a dictionary is don’t they? Or is this one of those times I have assumed something of other people?

I suppose not knowing the definition of the word dictionary is quite a vicious circle.

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