Starters for Ten-mas
I think I may have slightly airbrushed history (his story – clever, well it would be clever if it wasn’t want Michael Jackson did with his 23rd greatest hits package) with my memories of putting our Christmas tree up on about the 18th. I had a chat with my sister this morning and she claims we put them up on the 12th. Normally I would think my sister was just remembering something wrong. But this is too ‘my mum’ not to be true – because we put it up on the 12th because of the 12 days of Christmas (which have nothing to do with anything before Christmas).
Still the 12th is still quite late compared with your modern day – and as am sure I mentioned we were North Manchester council estate scum (did I mention that? Did I ever mention I was working class? I’m not sure I did you know. PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSYCHE!! HAHA!! I know I mention it, that was me riffing on the fact that I am a cunt) so that is practically Christmas Eve compared to a posh person having their tree up on the December 3rd.
I read up a little bit about this. Unsurprisingly Google sent me to religious sites that claimed the new trend of putting decorations up so early was down to a want by people to celebrate the feast of Christmas for longer, stretching it for the length of advent. And here was me just thinking it was a bunch of chavvy cunts being that tacky that they put their decorations up on the November 8th and this has been encouraged by advertisers who figure the longer Christmas lasts the longer they can make money selling mini pretzels and mince pies.
Main achievements are still being able to be in to take deliveries and going to get parcels that were delivered when I was at work – before the start of Leavecember. Today’s included a long internet cable so I don’t have to rely on the wireless while I am playing Call of Duty. I know – you believed me when I said I would do nothing important and then I go and lay this on you. All joking aside, it did get rid of the lag playing it wirelessly caused. But it also seemed to make the other people (12-year-old boys in Alabama, 57-year-old virgins, footballers etc) faster as well meaning I got shot in the face almost as quickly as before.
I didn’t take a picture yesterday but I am pretty sure there could be a terrible backlash if I drop these daily pictures for Leavecember. So I made this [honestly I did make it, it’s not just a picture of me in a Santa outfit. Also any suggestion that I have made myself thinner is a complete lie).