Saturday 26 November 2011

Annie Verse Heir He?

I am quite confident in my own intelligence. What other people think of it is another issue.

Sometimes I do wonder if I am thick as fuck however.

Have I mentioned that I am coming up to a year of this daily blog? Did I mention it? I think I might have mentioned it. Well I spent some time getting confused about when it would be the blog’s first anniversary. Was it the 365th blog or would it be the 366th blog, i.e. the first day of the second year? I batted this back and forth for some time. If only there was something I could compare this to – something ‘born’ on a certain date and this date being commemorated annually. But, no, nothing. Nothing for a long time. A long time – like how long it feels when you’re waiting for a flight home of a holiday: that long.

Where there was darkness – there was now light. BIRTHDAYS! Not the greetings card stores – the yearly celebration of people adding one to the total number of years they have been alive (age). By jove, I had it. You are born on a date and then on the corresponding date each year you celebrate your birthday. So the anniversary blog will be the one with the same date as the first one. Yes, you are right to look impressed that I figured this out all by myself.

If you think that is window in to my diseased little pysche how about this; I spent a good twenty minutes in the gym this morning thinking about the difference in meaning between accuracy and precision¹. I was right in what I was thinking but I kept pouring doubt on my own knowledge and had a little debate going on in my head. I swear if my head was a room it would be a mess and not very pleasant to be in.

¹Google it, what am I your fucking science teacher?

Another Million Dollar Idea

I was congratulating my friend Martin on his virility tonight when I staggered on another one of my amazing ideas that would make me rich (if they weren’t shit and I did anything about it). How’s about this: underpants with ‘this machine kills fascists’ written on the front?!? You know like Woody Guthry’s guitar. Yeah, you know.

I have tried to create a pair on the website where I have designed my own clothing in the past. Sadly it seems being able to personalise an underpant is limited to the side (towards the hip) or the rear (arse). None of the websites offering personalised gruds would allow me to put a statement on the front – it needs to be on the bit at the front – you know so it is over the cock bit. The joke is that the cock is the machine that kills fascists..did you not get that?

I will continue the product development.

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